• Jason Kiesau

No One is Naturally Good at Conflict


I don't think anyone is naturally good at managing or resolving conflict. It's stressful, it's uncomfortable and each of us default to our protection patterns.


Half the population is likely to engage (fight) and half the population is likely to avoid (flight).


Do you tend to engage or avoid?


Protection Patterns


Fight

A. Some unemotionally try to control the situation to reduce their tension

B. Some more emotionally tend to attack and defend to reduce their tension


Flight

C. Some tend to acquiesce and keep the peace to reduce their tension

D. Some unemotionally withdrawal and avoid to reduce their tension


Which pattern do you tend to rely on?


The goal of each pattern is to reduce our tension in that moment, rather than resolve the conflict all together and their lies the opportunities.


I don't know if anyone really gets comfortable with conflict, but we can work to better understand what tends to create stress and conflict for us (self-awareness) and how we tend to react. Based on that understanding we can try to better manage our protection pattern to deal with conflict more productively. (self-management)


Self-Awareness + Self-Management = Better Relationships & Results


Everyone is challenged with figuring this out.

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