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  • Writer's pictureJason Kiesau

Answer to Quora Question: Why are there many good and harmful people?

My Answer:

Most people are well intended and the really harmful people are probably at an extreme.

Our behavior is driven by our needs for emotional and physical safety and security. Most of our behaviors are automatic; we just do them with out any active thinking. The challenge is how one person behaves to meet their needs may be in direct opposition to another person’s need. So, without trying people are creating tension, stress and insecurity for each other.

The root cause is a lack of self-awareness and a lack of really understanding others.

When we are around people who meet our needs and we feel comfortable with, we’re more likely to assign positive traits and judgements and be more open to relationship developing. However, when we are around people who’s behaviors are not in alignment with our needs, we’re more likely to assign negative traits and judgements and we’ll have less interest in relationship.

The more we can learn about ourselves, the more intentional we can be with how we do things. The more we learn about others the more realistic expectations we can have with others and be intentional with our interactions to meet them where they are.

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